Nice try Jesus, Tomorrow's Party Is Still On

As many of you know, one of T-Mobile's major data centers in Bothell was the victim of mysterious flooding. If you want more specifics on the flooding just Google T-Mobile. It's all over the internet. Anyway, just because T-Mobile websites and other major systems are down that doesn't mean that tomorrow's "25th Anniversary Of Me Being Awake Gala" is being canceled. Oh no. It is still on.

Now, the timing of this flood seems a little strange to me. Hmm... just days before my major Gala steals the spotlight away from Jesus and his Christmas, what happens? T-Mobile is flooded. I don't know if any of you've read The Bible (Nokes hasn't; not into science fiction) but Lil Kim told me that Jesus/God has done this before. Apparently, one time he got so pissed off about something that he flooded the entire Earth. Then he forced some drunk senior citizen to build an arc and round up some lions or something. The balls! The Nokes would never abuse her power like that. Never. Let's look at the facts shall we:

1. I put together a Gala that is sure to steal Jesus' thunder this Christmas season

2. I snub Jesus by not inviting him

3. To add insult to injury I booked the freaking Garden Of Eden for the event! Even he hasn't been there in years. Doesn't like the vibe I guess.

Sounds like three things that are sure to piss Him off, right Nokesters? Fast forward to today and the building where we house the servers for all of our major systems is flooded. FLOODED. Sound familiar to anyone? Now everything is down... everything except The Nokes.

I guess he expected me to personally stay and rebuild all of the servers and recover data all day tomorrow. (all of which I of course, am capable of doing) Not happening. Before "The Second Great Flood" happened, I had actually told Lil Kim that I was going to invite Jesus after all. At first she was happy to hear that but then I told her that it was to get his crown of thorns, aka item #5 on my Christmas list of demands. Turns out Lil Kim is a devout Christian and didn't think that was right. Who knew? After she cleared up what "right and wrong" mean I decided that because Lil Kim is my homie, I would not try to steal the crown of thorns.

Well the gloves are off now! To hell with you Jesus. I just e-mailed Big Juicy J his invitation and wrote that the party has a hat theme. Gee, I wonder what he'll wear?

-Nokes Out!