Nokes here. Let's talk values. The Nokes is not good with words. In fact, The Nokes is the BEST with words. For this reason, we had to dumb-down some of the T-Mobile values so everyone would be able to understand them and not get offended. So while I acted like I was listening to some Sales Manager nobodies I put together a list of some values along with their original intent. It's my simple way of boosting morale since all T-Mobile employees would give their kidney for a glimpse into the mind of The Nokes:
- Trust in the positive intentions of others = DO NOT QUESTION ANYTHING I DO!
- I am T-Mobile. Count on me = DO NOT FUCK UP OR YOU WILL LOSE YOUR JOB!
- Practice Team-Together, Team Apart = I AM WATCHING EVERYTHING YOU DO EVEN WHEN YOU'RE NOT AT WORK SO BE VERY CAREFUL!
- Leaders coach and develop leaders = THE LESS YOU KNOW ABOUT YOUR JOB, THE BETTER. FIGURE IT OUT WITH YOUR IDIOTIC CO-WORKERS.
- Think Big, Act Small = DO NOT CROSS ME OR I WILL EAT YOU! YOUR IDEAS ARE STUPID AND NOT WELCOME!
Thank Nokes this Kick Off is almost over! Whoever decided on Denver for this event will be fired. Next year it's going to be on my moon base and T-Mobile won't be paying for the travel or hotel accommodations.
- Nokes Out!
(Note: all employees must give me a kidney by the end of Q1)
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9 comments:
OMFG! That was hilarious and probably true. Best blog in a while. I was reading this at work and started laughing my ass off. Then a customer walked in asking what was so funny. Ooooh, nothing. Thankfully I didn't have to unleash our store tiger on him. Go fake sue!
What if you only have 1 kidney left? Lol
She looks like a cartoon character,we should sell t-shirts with her big ugly head.All the Mangers who suck up to her should go straight to h_ _ _ with her.
Can we get these laminated to put in our badge holders? Thanks!
What about having 1 kidney left? I don't see your point.
ask nokes, hayes, jb, funcheon, cruz about dealers selling 5 single lines to unsuspecting customers, collecting commissions & causing customers to disconnect service. TMO knows and supports dealer fraud. hows that impacting wall street financials?
has tmo successfully removed all white males from sales org leadership roles yet?
@white male removal plan pt.1 : I assume you mean removal of all heterosexual males from sales org. roles? Or that you don't consider JB to be a 'real' man?
T-Mobile has went downhill since the Real Sue Nokes left. Whoever took her place is coming up with all kinds of dumb shit for us to do to over compensate her departure. Sue Nokes is a G
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